Succeed

Given the choice between comfort and pain, our tendency is toward comfort. It’s natural; why endure suffering, torment or pain when there’s another choice?
Not as natural is the uncomfortable learned truth that effort and discomfort are the ways to somewhere better. We see this all over our history as a species and in individual lives. Someone had to set sail over the horizon to find what lay beyond. We had to dismember human cadavers to learn about our own bodies, and we have to push ourselves in exercise, business and relationships to make them succeed too.
The latter is of interest,

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Introducing Tinder Gold – A First-Class Swipe Experience

Get the gold treatment.

We know you. You live in a world where every moment counts—where speed equals success, you’re always on the go, and you can’t let anything slow you down. Especially your Tinder feed.

That’s why we created Tinder Gold, a members-only service, offering our most exclusive features: Passport, Rewind, Unlimited Likes, five Super Likes per day, one Boost per month, and more profile controls—as well as our new Likes You feature, so that you can see who likes you before you swipe. Think of it as your personal Swipe Right concierge—available 24/7—bringing all of your pending matches to you.

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Inside Straight

Dating, courting and all that stuff revolves around figuring out what the other person’s thinking.
We cannot do this directly, in the sense of plugging in a computer, downloading what’s inside and riffling through the contents at our leisure. What we do is talk, listen, prompt, observe, react, note and synthesize. Problem is that all of these methods are indirect at best, and mostly misleading.
Talking is the way we communicate for the most part. Unfortunately this is the least reliable route to accurate assessment of someone. That’s because much of what we see is filtered through the higher, complex mechanisms of

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Toxic relationship? What To Do About It

  Anyone who has been in a toxic relationship can look back well after it ended and identify the exact time and causes of its untimely demise. Bad relationships usually occur when people enter into them without really knowing the other person. You may think that the dating process should take care of all the [...]

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Podcast #90 Be Happy!

Dark and moody might work in movies and fashion models, but who wants to couple with dark and moody? Especially those fashion models; they seem overstrung and underfed to me. Ahem.
Happy people do better than those with a gloom-cloud sitting over their head, not least when attracting and keeping someone close. There. That’s the answer to everything. Unless you want to hear Kregg and me expand a little upon that idea…

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Animal, Mineral, Vegetable

Animals live in a moment-to-moment world of surviving. Right now.
We, on the other hand, mildly live in that world, but we also live in a future world. We can look forward and visualize what we’ll need to survive (and thrive) three days, three weeks and three years from now.
That raises the tricky question of trade-offs. Sometimes we must sacrifice something in the present in order to make a more certain future.
Relationships, – especially marriage – are an example of this. Male nature is to satisfy sexual hunger with less than perfect discrimination. To forgo that drive in the interest of

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Rooted

The current fashion for proceeding through life seems to revolve around floating along on a cloud of shared trivia and shiftless experience. We’re completely up-to-date on everyone else and they’re likewise up to speed with us, no matter the depth or value of our experiences.
As someone else (I forgot) said (and I’m paraphrasing), never have lives so unlived been so well recorded.
I think it’s true with coupling, too. Linking with another person is not simply about choosing to link with them, as per online social networks. If we’re to give ourselves a chance of lasting, we need structures, both individually

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Podcast #89 Do Our Priors Doom Us?

Unless you’re a unicorn and find yourself coupling perfectly, forever, with your first date, you have a relationships history. As we explore ourselves and our meshing skills, some people say we accumulate baggage; others call it experience. Or character. Let’s go with that.
Here’s how Kregg and I look at this murky business.

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here

Seeking Shelter

It’s the fault of McDonalds. The fast food “restaurant” people taught us that we can have the same food – precisely the same food – no matter where we are and irrespective of the time of day. Everything that comes out of that place will look, feel, smell and taste the same, reliably and at an acceptable cost.
Even the downside of the whole experience doesn’t matter that much. Pink slime, underpaid staff and questionable ice machine cleanliness are realities we all accept because food is only the vehicle for what they sell. Their real game is safety and an anchorage.

Report This Post

Click to read the full post here